Quantcast

Jump to content

Photo

Life Can't Get Any Worse!


  • Please log in to reply
55 replies to this topic

#31 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 07 February 2013 - 12:59 PM

Thanks everyone......here is part of an email about my mom and going to appointment

She was not happy, but she went. I was unable to go into the appt with her. She said it went well.

I had to urge her and be a bit pushy and asked her to check her mail to see if the section 8 stuff was there. It was in her mailbox and we plan to complete that together today. We also see another social security doctor today. I will keep you posted. Talk to you soon.

We have to treat her like a kid. When I was home for Christmas, I dealt this the whole time I was home. It was the hardest thing for me to go through. I knew it wasn't get depression something else was wrong. I prayed and hoped that the doctors would say it was something else other than dementia.
Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#32 HoofsinMotion

HoofsinMotion

    Invisible Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 5,196 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Show Me State

Posted 07 February 2013 - 02:20 PM

(huggs) Sorry you are having a tough time right now.

Buddies & Familys, I have met:
Tuckaway,MixedUpTease,SpottedTApps & HSM Norm,Demon'sMom & Eric,rattusrat & Notyo,ghridinGA & Clay & Chey,LashMan,BBBlue,HeartFeltFarm& Wayne& Bella,Apps4Life & Jim,Loranbama & Dee, Kellie,Susan.
Skippen&Donavinn,vicklynn&Hubby,LoudAppy,spiffyGrl,robertbel1,Justme&Hubby,TheSugarLady,HarleyNHS & Mother,tuper & Sister, SpringStorm.

 


#33 Indianshuffler

Indianshuffler

    Advanced Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 1,390 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:SE Mich

Posted 07 February 2013 - 03:40 PM

Praying here.
I know it is hard to stand on the faith of your mothers love, when something this bad happens, but that love will always be there for you. Even though the dementia is taking her mind, it can't take her love. Hold onto that.
I lost my mom in her mid forties to a double brain anyursym. I was in my mid twenties at the time. I hope that the weight of us pulling for you helps you to keep going. She would want that.
People who will tell you the brutal truth when needed are keepers

#34 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 07 February 2013 - 06:17 PM

Praying here.
I know it is hard to stand on the faith of your mothers love, when something this bad happens, but that love will always be there for you. Even though the dementia is taking her mind, it can't take her love. Hold onto that.
I lost my mom in her mid forties to a double brain anyursym. I was in my mid twenties at the time. I hope that the weight of us pulling for you helps you to keep going. She would want that.


Been trying to remember that. Just got back into running because i needed to clear my mind. It has helped a little.
Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#35 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 10 February 2013 - 06:56 PM

Not sure what to do......with losing Melody and news about my mom (her state of mind) because I had planned only finally taking a vacation this year and at the same time celebrate my 30th birthday. My plan is go to Alaska for a camping trip around Labor Day, but now with my mom just not sure about it. I feel greedy or selfish if I go away.

In the past my time off has been used for vacations in Maine.....my current company only does 13 days of paid time off (that is vacation and sick time), so I would use 6 days for this trip.
Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#36 ozland

ozland

    I'm an optimist. I think most people are half full of it.

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 45,280 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:USA

Posted 10 February 2013 - 08:44 PM

Go. It will help YOUR state of mind. You need that right now. It is NOT selfish to re-charge your batteries, so to say. Makes the hard things a bit easier to handle.

S'cuse me, gotta go iron my birthday suit.

For those who believe, no explanation is necessary.
For those who do not, no explanation will suffice.
.................Joseph Dunninger


Calling an illegal alien an undocumented immigrant is like calling
a drug dealer an unlicensed pharmacist


#37 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 10 February 2013 - 10:14 PM

Go. It will help YOUR state of mind. You need that right now. It is NOT selfish to re-charge your batteries, so to say. Makes the hard things a bit easier to handle.


Thanks......just in the past few months some her siblings have said somethings to my brother and I that was hurtful. To sum it up I've been called an ungreatful, unappreciated, and uncaring daughter because I will not drop my life in NY to move home to Maine to take of my mom. My brother lives in Maine, but 175 miles away from my mom and lost his job last April. He tooked a seasonal job that was $20 dollars an hour pay hit because it was more than unemployment at the time. He to was called somethings because he didn't come down much. My mom has always said "I want you to come home only if that is what you want, not because of rough times in your life or mine".

That is why I am torn because I will have to deal with her siblings.

Edited by marie02, 10 February 2013 - 10:15 PM.

Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#38 ozland

ozland

    I'm an optimist. I think most people are half full of it.

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 45,280 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:USA

Posted 10 February 2013 - 10:19 PM

I really DO understand about siblings. They can be a real crapper. Isn't it funny how you are 'ungrateful' because you don't take the whole burden off THEM? Take some time for YOU. You are going to need it.

S'cuse me, gotta go iron my birthday suit.

For those who believe, no explanation is necessary.
For those who do not, no explanation will suffice.
.................Joseph Dunninger


Calling an illegal alien an undocumented immigrant is like calling
a drug dealer an unlicensed pharmacist


#39 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 11 February 2013 - 12:24 PM

I really DO understand about siblings. They can be a real crapper. Isn't it funny how you are 'ungrateful' because you don't take the whole burden off THEM? Take some time for YOU. You are going to need it.


Thanks. They are same ones that my mom asked to co-sign for my education at prestigous university and they all said no. I have my job out here and life. They think I can afford to come home at every turn ($250 both ways for one trip is the gas and tolls). My brother is about $100 both ways.

Just makes it harder on me.
Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#40 DaisyTenPonies

DaisyTenPonies

    Ive always been crazy ..

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 4,238 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:On a fast horse.

Posted 13 February 2013 - 07:38 PM

I am so sorry. She is way too young for this to happen! Sending all the good energy I can muster!

KidsNCritters .. that is an AWFUL story! I am sorry for you as well!

Cowgirls are the gypsy kind ..
They need their reins laid on them loose.




#41 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 25 February 2013 - 10:43 PM

Thanks everyone......it hasnt been an easy 3 weeks, but I am finally pulling myself up and brushing off the dirt as the saying goes.
Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#42 Mz Rat

Mz Rat

    Advanced Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 3,218 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Texas

Posted 25 February 2013 - 11:48 PM

While your mom is being cared for, go to Alaska. You can not do anything for your mom unless you are mentally and physically able. I still talk to my dad mentally. He has been gone over 30 years now.
Prayers sent for you and your family.

#43 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 05 March 2013 - 08:05 PM

Mz Rat, thanks for the advice!
Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#44 Alaskandraft

Alaskandraft

    Let it snow!

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 7,779 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Somewhere near Santa Claus

Posted 05 March 2013 - 11:45 PM

word of advice take the interior Alaska one.. it will most likely rain the whole time during the "inside Passage" one in Southeast Alaska.. will be warm and beautiful in Fairbanks in the summer or Anchorage in that matter... Take the vacation... you will be sorry you didn't when she finally gets too bad.. I watched this with my Grandma when my Grandpa got it. Bless her she took care of him but he accupied lots of her time...

b575c2b0-fc46-4324-b0e9-28cf032b9558_zps

 

Home of :

The horses/Deborah K Farcuer, Bonita Angelica, JJ Tuff Butt, Snows Miss Nooks, Pleasantly Pefect, Zephyr and Airee

The Dogs/ Indigo, CoCo, Max and Minnie   The Cats/ Tynee Kitty, Mockie, Powder & Spook  The Pigs/ KC and LAY C Masterpiece


#45 equicrzy

equicrzy

    Advanced Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 9,956 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Arizona and New Mexico

Posted 06 March 2013 - 12:57 AM

Actually, things COULD be worse....wanna trade?!

Sorry, I do sympathize, but, in all fairness, the title IS, " life can't get any worse" and I'm here to tell ya....yes, it can.

I wasn't going to say anything and, probably shouldn't have, but, when people post things like this, even though they have no way of knowing other people's situations, or, what they've been through...the comparison seems rather, trivial.

No offense to you, I'm sure what you're going through is very real and seems like the worse thing ever...believe me, it COULD be worse, just be thankful it isn't.
Posted Image

#46 Ann Wheeler

Ann Wheeler

    Advanced Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 12,892 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Winter Wonder Land

Posted 06 March 2013 - 06:24 AM

:huggy: :angel3: :huggy:

#47 nick

nick

    Advanced Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 10,017 posts
  • Location:germany

Posted 06 March 2013 - 10:18 AM

i've been through all of what you have (horse didn't die in a barn fire, but i had to have him euth'd and know exactly what you mean it feels like your heart's been ripped out.)

my mother in law has advanced dementia (doesn't recognize her adult children anymore and last year lunged at my sister in law apparently with the intent to strangle her while sil was feeding her cake.) as crass as it sounds, you HAVE to find the humor in it. after the first OMG reaction when sil told us this we were in stitches!!

when my parents became ill my brother and his family were living in singapore and i was here. you can't give up your life because your parent becomes ill. you and other family members do (IMO) have a moral obligation to see to it that she is taken care of, and this means role reversal. it's very difficult to become the parent at first, but just like with a lot of things you get better with practice.

i also learned that if you don't take care of your own needs and make your personal healthy state of mind a priority you can't take care of anyone else very effectively. guilt trips are for losers, whether you're the one laying it or the one buying it--respect that you have a right to a life with all of its ups and downs.

i saw that this thread started a month ago--hope things have stabilized a bit.

Edited by nick, 06 March 2013 - 10:19 AM.

nick

#48 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 10 March 2013 - 05:56 PM

Actually, things COULD be worse....wanna trade?!

Sorry, I do sympathize, but, in all fairness, the title IS, " life can't get any worse" and I'm here to tell ya....yes, it can.

I wasn't going to say anything and, probably shouldn't have, but, when people post things like this, even though they have no way of knowing other people's situations, or, what they've been through...the comparison seems rather, trivial.

No offense to you, I'm sure what you're going through is very real and seems like the worse thing ever...believe me, it COULD be worse, just be thankful it isn't.


I said in the original post that I know it can. At the time it felt like things my life was tipped upside down and thrown about, I was asked to put the puzzle back together.
Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#49 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 10 March 2013 - 06:01 PM

An update.....

I am still battle my health and it is getting worse. My biopsy showed something irregular, but it is inconculsive and more testing has been.

I know my mom can get worse because I remember when my grandfather went through it when I was younger. I saw what it did to the adults, but now I am going through it. My brother is still in denial and hasn't done anything, so it is being left up to me.

As the month has gone on the grief has gotten easier, but I still wake up at 4am with this horrible feeling like I did that morning. A part of Melody's halter was found in the barn clean up and is being given to me after it is cleaned.

Edited by marie02, 10 March 2013 - 06:08 PM.

Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#50 Alaskandraft

Alaskandraft

    Let it snow!

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 7,779 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Somewhere near Santa Claus

Posted 10 March 2013 - 10:16 PM

Bury the halter and set up a memorial for your girl... a place you can go to talk to her.. hanging onto it will only bring sadness & remind you of her when you look at it.. DO NOT DEWL on things... continue with your life because it is short and very precious...

Siblings are a pain and I always ask my mom why she didn't stop with me and she laughs and says.. "well you are a middle child"! Oh yeah.. but I don't have to hang onto their poor behavior..... dementia really sucks...and I do sympathize with you but I watched my grandma laugh and enjoyed life while grandpa slowly went downhill....

Sadness and depression does effect our health.. be happy and laugh at life... it has many challenges and laughter is its cure when those challenges get harder.....

AD

b575c2b0-fc46-4324-b0e9-28cf032b9558_zps

 

Home of :

The horses/Deborah K Farcuer, Bonita Angelica, JJ Tuff Butt, Snows Miss Nooks, Pleasantly Pefect, Zephyr and Airee

The Dogs/ Indigo, CoCo, Max and Minnie   The Cats/ Tynee Kitty, Mockie, Powder & Spook  The Pigs/ KC and LAY C Masterpiece


#51 Becaco

Becaco

    I Cowgirled Up

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 18,460 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:West Texas

Posted 11 March 2013 - 08:30 AM

:angel3: :huggy:

#52 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 11 March 2013 - 11:34 AM

Bury the halter and set up a memorial for your girl... a place you can go to talk to her.. hanging onto it will only bring sadness & remind you of her when you look at it.. DO NOT DEWL on things... continue with your life because it is short and very precious...

Siblings are a pain and I always ask my mom why she didn't stop with me and she laughs and says.. "well you are a middle child"! Oh yeah.. but I don't have to hang onto their poor behavior..... dementia really sucks...and I do sympathize with you but I watched my grandma laugh and enjoyed life while grandpa slowly went downhill....

Sadness and depression does effect our health.. be happy and laugh at life... it has many challenges and laughter is its cure when those challenges get harder.....

AD


My aunt is taking some of my pictures and putting them in the a frame with halter being in it. I like your idea, but I do not own property.
Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#53 marie02

marie02

    Gooberville

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 15,385 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Where the river runs green

Posted 18 March 2013 - 11:22 AM

Update....

I went down to the farm over the weekend......was hard but needed to do it so that I can start healing. I spent time with his family and just caught up on things. The kitten that made it out alive was up at the house and is just the most lovable thing ever.

I did get the piece of halter and found out it was found 5 feet from the door (no I didn't want to know that...it escaped his mouth when he handed it to me). I am burying it in Maine at my aunts farm where I can go see it. Also, I forgot my spurs where left down there and got burnt. Those have been cleaned up and are going into a picture frame (collage like one) with some of melody's pictues.

I am working deligently on the fundaraiser for the family. They took great care of my Melody, so this is the least I can do as a repayment.
Life is full of surprises it is our chance to enjoy them no matter what they are.

**Off to see the wonderful wizard**


Posted Image
GreyStonesMelodicMiss, aka Melody or My Mousey Moose. My love. My best friend. My companion. My strength. My girl.

May 19th 2009-February 1st 2013. Rest In Peace My One True Love Of A Lifetime.

#54 Toledo

Toledo

    Member

  • Members
  • PipPip
  • 742 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Canada

Posted 18 March 2013 - 11:57 AM

So sorry... hoping things improve for you quickly.

#55 Wild Rose

Wild Rose

    Horse Maid

  • Moderators
  • PipPipPip
  • 48,314 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:Hibbing, MN

Posted 18 March 2013 - 01:31 PM

:huggy: :huggy: :huggy:

BOARD BUDDY CLUB MEMBER I have met 33 board buddies!
MEMBER OF OZLAND SURVIVORS
MEMBER OF THE TURD POSSE - MSTRBKBHRWNS

Rosie, aka Hankie Doc

http://www.allbreedp....com/hankie doc

 

PrettyRosie-1.jpgChiefforsiggy-1-1-2.jpgIMG_0194cropped-1.jpg
Rosie....................Chief...........................Jedi
Rosie_in_the_mist.jpg
Rosie in the Mist

R.I.P. Snow Chief, August 25, 1980 - April 16, 2009
You were the best trail horse ever.


Old dogs and children, and watermelon wine...


#56 Greenhaven

Greenhaven

    relocation specialist

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 10,203 posts
  • Gender:Female
  • Location:neither here nor there

Posted 18 March 2013 - 01:59 PM

I think it is wonderful that you are jumping in to help the family anyway you can; I hope that helps bring healing even speedier.

4b1c581c-39b7-405f-abef-516179bc504c_zps

My Tuesday!

 

 

"Blessed are the flexible for they shall not be bent out of shape."

"Learn the art of horsemanship fully, for the horse is not prejudiced, and will throw a prince as quick as a groom" -Xenophon via sisely

Board buddies I have met: ozland, rattusrats, serendell, Wild Rose, kat, WildMare, Serah Rose, BarnBarb831, RailroadWoman, *BurgundyBlankets*, spanish_walkin_wannabe, Appaloosa Luver, journeysgirl
nagolder (phone)