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BarrelBlondie22

The "circle Of Trust"

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well seeing as how my horse has a great judge of character, I have yet to meet a man who passes maverick's test...dam horse.... haha actually at the moment my life is so busy I feel that any relationship I would have would have to be half hearted because I am already stretching myself thin, so for the time being, maverick is the only man in my life... but hopefully that will change

so I don't have a boyfriend, there are candidates but I would rather enjoy them from a distance and not start or end things on a sour note because I can't put enough of my time into it....also because I am NOT willing to sacrifice horse time...not even negotiable

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It's official, I am head over heels.

But I can't help it.

He's cute, he's sweet, he's respectful, he's funny, he's got his life together.

That last one is a biggie. I've always been the type to have a plan, notsomuch down to every minute, but I just can't fly by the seat of my pants when it comes to the bigger things in life. My ex had no plan, and he was just delusional about things in life. He couldn't plan anything - he refused to set aside time to spend with me, just because something better might come up. Real winner, I know.

Talon's got his act together. He's a serious student and I am too - I was minorly taken aback when he told me I couldn't come over one night because he had to study, but now I'm okay with it and appreciate the priorities. We'll probably have library dates this semester, haha.

He makes me feel wanted. I don't feel like he's just along for the ride. It's so hard to read him sometimes though, just because I've never had a guy who didn't read like an open book. Maybe he does read like an open book and I'm just not use to having a guy who's openly affectionate...

The only thing that worries me is scaring him off. They say women know way faster than men if they can see themselves marrying a guy someday. I can. I can totally see it. But there's a long road between now and then. He's a year behind me, but is looking at an extra semester, and I'm going to stay and do my MBA so I'll finish everything a semester after him as it stands right now. Then he'll have four years in the Air Force. He wants to be stationed at the base in Japan... that's what worries me the most. I think I would follow him though, provided I could get a good civilian job over there - actually two of my top companies right now have offices over there...so it's not out of the question.

Another thing I've realized. Looking back over the years - I've never dated a guy with a "normal" family. I guess my first bf would be about as close as it gets, but his parents were way older, he was an uh-oh baby, 10+ years between him and the next sibling, he grew up playing with his nephew who was only 3 months younger. The next closest was adopted, but somehow that situation was still awakward. The rest have all been from divorced families. Not that there's a problem with that - just thinking about it made me think.

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Have you posted pictures? Because I want to say I've seen some picture similar to the guy you've described.

I could be crazy.

I'm still amazed with these girls who can survive with their man away.

I'd be a mess. I feel for you all.

I posted a link to one....but that was a portrait shot so you can't tell how much of a string bean he is (for lack of a better term...haha)

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i can't tell if i like boy or not anymore. we live like 30 minutes away from eachother so i've been seeing him like 3/4 times a week (he comes to my house once or twice during the week and i see him on the weekend). we've been getting along well. but over winter break i guess something just "un-clicked" and i'm finding him a bit annoying and unattractive. i do tend to get annoyed of people pretty easily so it may just be that we hung out too much over winter break.

but anyways, i haven't seen him since sunday. usually during the week i somewhat miss him, this week i haven't really felt that...maybe its because i'm on my adderall so overall i'm a more happy/emotionally stable person (haha). i missed him a bit last night when i was crying about my mom, but now i'm back to normal.

he's coming over today (he wanted to come over tuesday but i put it off). i dunno. i feel like i might need more time away before i see him. ugh i know he really likes me and i don't want to play games with him, which is why i'm trying to figure this out. i guess i'll know when i see him again.

i think i may still like him, but for a period of like two weeks i really did love him so *just* liking him doesn't feel like enough.

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Vito - I know how you feel. I was pretty smitten by a guy for a couple weeks. Then his true colors started coming through. Nothing horrible, nothing I didn't know ahead of time actually - but that shiney newness just started to wear off and the bad things became more apparent.

Its like buying a great looking super cute new pair of shoes. You keep looking at them in your closet thinking about how cute they are and how you wish you had someplace to wear them too. When you finally wear them though you realize just how uncomfortable they can be...

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Honeymoon phase - yes.

Somewhere between six months and a year the "everything is so perfect and I loff him so much!" phase is over and you get down to the real meat and potatoes of the relationship.

Every relationship is going to have ups and downs and fights. I can't imagine what Talon and I's first fight will be like because neither of us are fighters, we're both pretty laid back and understanding....but I'm sure it'll happen eventually. Probably over something incredibly stupid really.

The fact of the matter is, relationships are work. Love is not always happy go lucky and the most amazing feeling in the world. Sometimes it hurts. Sometimes it's not fun. But when the person means enough to you, you work through it.

If you're always the one making the sacrifice - that's a big red flag. If you're always the first one to say "I'm Sorry" no matter who started it - another big red flag. But sometimes those big red flags are mighty hard to see for that big red heart that keeps getting in the way.

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There was definitely a time when my relationship changed from the "honeymoon" phase.. or whatever you called it. lol. We had issues with him being really jealous if I ever hung out with any guys at all (which was difficult because I had a lot of guys that were friends.. and nothing more). It took awhile but the biggest thing in getting through that was just communication... him telling me when he was uncomfortable with a situation and me being completely open with what I was doing, and making sure not to hang out alone with guys or anything because I didn't want to do anything to make him wonder.

Also, for awhile I for some reason started picking at every little thing about him. I was critical of him and yet I still expected him to always just compliment me. I had to realize that the relationship works both ways, and he wants me to let him know how much he means to me and all the things I love about him.

Of course it's never easy, especially with him leaving all the time, but the number one thing for me is probably looking at every situation from both our points of view and acting based on that.

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hey yall thanks for the help/questions/whatever else haha

he turned 19 yesterday and i turned 18 in november. so wer're roughly a yr apart. it's a long distance relationship to begin with - hes and hour away from me - (not 700 mi - eeeekk! thats rough Iwoan Rebel) and now that he has his own business hes super busy. he's alot of fun to be around and he loves going to horse shows (for the food more then anything. lol) so, sigh. i guess, lol

he's already talking about marriage and im not sure if he's kidding or not, which intimidates me! [shocked]

thanks for the compliment hunters, he is even cuter with his hair grown out! and he's so nice to me, probably more then i deserve. lol.

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I hateeee when you can't be good friends with a guy without everyone making assumptions that youre sectretly dating or you like him. [bang Head]

because god forbid im good friends with a boy with no intentions of liking him!

Completely agree.

My best friend right now is a guy. We hang out all the time, call each other every day, etc. etc. He's my best friend and I love him. But I'm definitely not in love with him.

We don't act boyfriend/girlfriendy, yet people still assume that we're going out or like each other.

It's so annoying.

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I hateeee when you can't be good friends with a guy without everyone making assumptions that youre sectretly dating or you like him. [bang Head]

because god forbid im good friends with a boy with no intentions of liking him!

Agreeeeeed.

If I could count the times in the past 3 days I've been asked/told that I like this kid. I DO not. He's like my brother. Ew.

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well, there are these two guys.

i haven't seen either of them since the end of may.

one lives across the state. and i have no way whatsoever of contacting him, and chances are i'll never see him again.

the other one, i believe, just went to the east coast (i'm on the west coast) to attend a fancy vet school. If he hadn't left, i would have seen him, at the latest, this summer. but now, i just don't know.

it's great.

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Well, to be a complete cliched jerk, two wrongs don't make a right.

And though they're hot, that shouldn't be an excuse.

Have you ever considered why you treat them that way?

I've thought about it wayyy too, and I've come to a completely lame conclusion...actually, no I have no conclusion.

I'm going to go ponder the meaning of life a bit more now.

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Robert and I have been together for a little over 2.5 years. We got an apartment together back in October and it's great to finally be living together. He's in the military and there's been many times where we've gone months at a time without seeing eachother. Thankfully he hasn't been deployed yet and can't be for about another 1.5 - 2 years because he's not qualified yet (electrical engineer).

We're actually engaged. He's amazing. He's the best thing to ever happen to my life aside from horses. He doesn't know a ton about horses but he likes to learn and is always asking me questions. He even wants me to teach him how to ride :smilie: He kinda knows how but not a lot a lot. I've only seen him ride my mare who is so broke it's not even funny.

His next posting is in about 3 years and he's already put in a request for Cold Lake, Alberta. And he has a really good chance of getting whatever he wants because there aren't very many guys in his trade so he's treated as more of an individual instead of a number. We plan on buying some land and building our own home and barn. I'll be done my Equine Studies program and we're going to have a training/lesson/boarding barn. We'll probably also have cattle. And he said when it's comes to a point in time where they want to move him away from there he'll consider getting out. He really appreciates the fact that I need ot have horses in my life and I can't do what I want if we're moving every 3-5 years. He wants me to be happy.

He loves my family and they love him. We always have a good time together and he can get me out of any kind of bad mood. He tries to cook me supper when he knows I'm tired (he's not hte most amazing cook and doesn't really know what to do in the kitchen but he tries lol). He cleans the apartment with me every Sunday. We go everywhere together. He supports me in whatever it is that I want to do and he encourages me. He makes me feel like I can do anything if I set my mind to it. He never runs out of compliments. I can't even say enough good things about him. He's just amazing. Whenever we run into problems we always find a way through it, together. There have been a few times where a less committed couple would have eneded things (seperation, arguments, friends trying to sabotage things) but we always join forces and get through it. We know we want to be together and we're not going to give that up easily.

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I know(met) this kid Cole. We met shipping cattle at the neighbors. I likedddddddd him a lot. hes joining the marines. hes 18 and im 14 but oh well. but im super worried. i dont know why. i barely know him.

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Alright.. pictures.

My roommate says this photo doesnt do him justice...

He is not my type at all... but maybe thats just what I need...

l_22049336110ab71fd51022c5af705720.jpg

He use to be pretty into body building.. but hes kind of gotten out of it now that he has a full time job (14 hrs a day!) and is going back to college... But he is still pretty big and strong. Kinda hawt. haha

213577867_l.jpg

his sr. photo from a few years ago

271086502_l.jpg

err.. yea. thats him...

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well i saw him today. i still like him i just don't love him. hmm.

some pictures though! all the pictures of me and him he's wasted and looks gnar haha so these are others.

he thinks hes a punk...he's on the right:

colin.jpg

and 2 years ago, he was like 18 (he's 2 years older than me) this is in japan he's pretty sweaty.

he's on the right again

colinjapan.jpg

^he now has tattoos on both shoulders though...i'm pretty sure he'll regret them when he's older haha

Edited by vito

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Here's us on his graduation day.

It'll be 2 years in May.

justingrad2.jpg

We met at work...I never thought ANYTHING would happen but he ended up like falling in LOVE with me like after our first date....Anyways, he graduated college and moved to California where he got a sweet job. He'll work a couple weeks and have a couple weeks off so on his weeks off he visits me and the long distance thing isn't too bad. I talk to him via webcam and I'm so busy I don't have time to miss him. And it works because I trust him and he's TOTALLY committed and dedicated to me. He screwed things up once, and I gave him a second chance and he's been totally devoted to me since. He knows what he could have lost. I don't really know what it is but somehow I am his life. He's not happy without me. I tell him to get a hobby but apparently I am his hobby. I love him. But I love my horse more and it'll probably always be that way!! Haha!

ride the hide....your bf sounds like mine.

He wants to "make my dreams come true". He can always make me feel better and never gets mad or frustrated with me. Never snaps at me or says a harse word even when I deserve it [i can get annoying and a little....witchy haha]. All he does is want to be with me. He sets goals and achieves them. He's smart. He's really dedicated to anything he decides to do. The family loves him...he's been to Thanksgiving and Christmas. He understands that we WILL own horse property and we WILL have horses. He even wants to buy a horse. He wants a horse that nobody wants, lol. One that isn't good at anything so he's not wasting it. Silly. He's goofy and acts too young for his age sometimes but he's SO stinkin' ADORABLE and CUTE sometimes I can't get over it. He's willing to wait for me to finish college....never pressures me to move down there with him although I'd LOVE to I just gotta take the horse and financially that'll never happen. I choose the horse over him but he's okay with that. Every other day he says "I'm gonna marry you someday, you know that?" And I probably will. But I don't want to think about that until I am nearly graduated with college. I wouldn't mind being engaged in a year or two but marriage is SCARY to me. Kinda freaks me out. Anyways. That's my little story and boy.

The end.

DSCF0180.jpg

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I'll post a picture when I get home. Hopefully getting out of the office early - but oh yeah, we mixed up your project due dates. It's due a month earlier! Which...happens to be today! Suprise!

re: hanging out with other guys/girls.

Not being able to do that is a big deal breaker for me. My best friend is a guy and nothing will break us up. I was really worried about what would happen when I got a new boyfriend earlier this year because I was all but living with the guys downstairs. Soooo...I just got around that by finding a boy through them. Problem solved. He calls me up, I tell him I'm hanging out with Jeff, Dan, and Logan - no big deal! Woo!

In other news, I'm smitten. This was a text conversation last night...

Me: Beer and football!!! [i'm 21, thats legit.]

Him: Haha Jeopardy here [He's staying with his grandparents who don't have cable and love jeopardy.]

Me: What is I miss you?

Him: The answer for what I am thinking about now.

Awwwww.....

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Aw, I love reading all of these!

Um, my boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. I've known him and we've been friends for about 10 years... but we lived pretty far away from each other/ lost contact/ etc. We're still about 45 minutes from each other, which is hard. I can't even imagine having an actual long distance relationship. I think I'd go crazy! We're so much alike it's scary sometimes. Within the next year we're both trying to get things together enough to live together, then we'll see what happens. The only thing that's really keeping me (us) from being 100% is his family- it's a huge long saga that I tend to get... a little rabid about.

Photo88.jpg

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Hmm, all add to this- waiting for a cake to bake and just had an encounter with him.

So, he's the manager at my car repair place. And totally not the typical redneck muscle man dirty mechanic either- honestly, put the man in a suit and tie and he could be a GQ model, he's very classy. About 6 foot, dark curly hair, kinda tanned, little bit of stubble, killer shy smile, on the slender side, and THE MOST Amazing grey-green eyes. Absolutely stunning. I'd say around 30. Kinda picture Adrian Grenier with less hair. Oh, AND he's Australian, with the accent to boot.

So, it so happens that I live on a gravel road, and have lots of flat tires. So, we sorta got to know each other through my many trips there this fall. He calls me by my first name, would recognize me anywhere, we've chatted about about horses, dogs, etc, but not very much.

I had a lull in the flat tires, didn't see him for several months, until this week. My mom had her car in, had a conversation with him, and was pretty sure he had a girlfriend, b/c he told her that "we" have a dog. Bummer.

Well, I was waiting yesterday for some new tires, and he was on his phone with a friend, but I could only catch parts of his conversation, b/c people were talking loudly. Anyway, he asked his friend how the holidays went, and then replied "you know, just the single guy thing." So, not 100% sure he was referring to himself, but maybe he's single!

Anyway, went in for an oil change this morning, and brought my dog. We both have Aussies that are the same age! He showed me a pic of "his" (not "our") dog, Dinkum (apparently an Aussie term, fair-dinkums?). Just a pic of the dog on his desk, no girlfriend that I saw.

So, we have a lot in common. I don't know what to do next. He's really nice and friendly to me, though he can be extremely shy, if a) my dad comes in, or B) I come in in school, and not barn clothes, which happen to be very hott.

Wait for him to ask me out, if he's interested? Or potentially make him and me very embarrassed if I ask him to coffee, and he's not interested or already taken? And then have an awkward tire place.

2 good signs: 1- he calls me "darling" 2- he changed my flat tire for free last week!

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Kiss The Sky, because hes done so much maintance on your car/ families tell him you would like to take him out to lunch or coffee as a thank you for all the work hes done. This way its not really a date and you can chat and see where it goes.

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Well, I consider myself kind of lucky. My boyfriend(Nick) and I have been together since June 6th '08. Uhm, we kind of jumped way ahead of our selves and moved in with eachother after being together 2-2 1/2 months. It was a big decision to move in together so early but his dad had just gotten remarried and said he needed to be gone by the 15th of august i believe. (he's 22 and had been gone for a year to Iraq and had only been back a few months)

Me and my parents were not getting along at the time so we just did it. Eveything has been sooo amazing for the most part. I think that we are going to go along way with eachother. We went through some hard times, still kind of are but we don't let it ruin our relationship.

Money has been our issue since day 1. I work a part time job at Autozone and he was working an under the table job when we first moved in. Less than 2 weeks later his boss quit calling all his employees so Nick was out of a job.

Me on the other hand lost my lisence, got arrested for driving while license suspended, and had about 800+ in fines i had to pay to get my lisence back. on top of THAT we hadn't paid rent because we couldn't get ahold of the land lord... It was a big mess and yet, we still love eachother emencly. We are doing way better financially, and are getting caught back up on rent. Our only problem is finding a new home for our anatolian shepherd.. our landlord is being dumb and only wants 1 dog on the property.. bleh oh well.

So much stress in such a short time, he tells me all the time he doesn't think he could have made it with out me here and I feel the same. I mean it was a foolish decision to move out in the first place for me with out having any money saved up in the bank at all.

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i forgot....i, the girl that goes for the "old" (usually like 5ish years older) guys, sorta kinda maybe has a thing for one of my best friends....who's 15. I keep catching myself thinking about kissing him. Why? I wish i knew....

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How old are you?

I've always liked guys older than me.

Though my boyfriend is only two years older...still older, nonetheless.

I'm 17, 4 months from 18....he's 5 months from 16.

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Haha, a nice hippie-film-festival boy.

We kind of have similar types.

And it's an environmental film festival!

Also. Your boy definitely looks like one of my friends. If he were a pirate.

Which is cool.

I'm 17, 4 months from 18....he's 5 months from 16.

I do know of at least a few 14-16 guy-girl relationships, which is the same gap, although at least they were going to the same school. And they worked as well as any other relationship with people of the same age.

Some of my girl friends have dated a year or two down; some of my guy friends have dated a year or two up.

As long as they can get past the age difference in the first place, it doesn't seem to have come up again in any of those relationships as a problem, either. (Ha, except one where this girl tried to maul my friend, but that had more to do with her being crazy than anything else.)

It's just not really as big of a deal as people seem to make it out to be, I think.

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Well, there's two of them.

And they are brothers.

The one graduated last year when I was a sophmore (so we are 2 years apart).

The other is in my grade.

They are both farm boys.

Dairy boys to be exact.

I've always had a little thing about the one in my grade it's just that he can be immature at times and he had a girlfriend for like...ever but now she's gone.

The older one I have known for a while- never really talked to one on one a whole lot- he was our FFA president and all that jazz so that's how I got to know him.

This last July at our fair (I was showing horse & they were there with their cows) I kept my eye on the older guy because the younger one was still with his girlfriend. I noticed him watching me and purposely walking over to the arena with his friends when I was riding my horse, he'd walk through the barn when I was sitting next to my stall cleaning tack, you know, all that silly stuff.

Last day of fair he comes up to one of my friends and starts asking questions about me but then found out I was 2 years younger than him.

BAM.

There goes my chance.

I haven't seen him since besides driving past where he works and his house when I'm on my way to my friend's house.

Basically- if I could put the two of them together into one, it'd be perfect.

The younger one's looks and some of his sense of humor and the older one's overall attitude and oh yeah, his truck too :).

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well seeing as how my horse has a great judge of character, I have yet to meet a man who passes maverick's test...dam horse.... haha actually at the moment my life is so busy I feel that any relationship I would have would have to be half hearted because I am already stretching myself thin, so for the time being, maverick is the only man in my life... but hopefully that will change

so I don't have a boyfriend, there are candidates but I would rather enjoy them from a distance and not start or end things on a sour note because I can't put enough of my time into it....also because I am NOT willing to sacrifice horse time...not even negotiable

Those are exactly my current thoughts. I have a number of potentials (I really don't know why, considering I hardly talk to most of them) but as of right now, no time for relationships. I felt pretty lonely...at first, sometimes I still do. But, when I'm with my horse I couldn't be any happier.

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