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So I'm Pretty Sure I'm Having A Midlife Crisis At 19?

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I swear things were great....Long story short me and the boyfriend broke up...I loved this guy like crazy but we had issues, and it was partially mutual... But I need a change...I'm planning on quitting my job in Florida and I guess driving till I find somewhere else to go...? Maybe I'm depressed, maybe i'm having a midlife crisis but I'm so sick of Florida...To much drama, to many memories... Dunno where i'm going to end up?Not even sure why i'm even posting this...I guess I don't know....

I think maybe i'm just going crazy?

Now to figure out where i'm going..... Maybe i'll find a horsefarm that needs help?

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Sorry to hear about you and your bf. You're not crazy at all, I think we all go through it. I might suggest going to yardandgroom.com before you leave though. They have tons of strictly horse jobs on there and all over the US =) Good Luck and keep us posted :smileywavey:

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I've been looking on there... But I'm planning on going home packing, and just heading out on the road.... Dunno where i'm going. Dont have any family that could/would take me in... Most of my friends can't either or they're in Florida... It's hard, we almost made it to a year but we went through a lot and meh it's just super sad.... and I need a change..... I need out of Florida for good....

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What kind of riding do you want to do? I used to work for a place in the Adirondack mountains in NY and I took out trail rides. Gorgeous country, free room and board, good pay, and real good tips. It was a blast and I'd do it again in a heartbeat if I could. And that'd be a pretty good haul from FL to NY lol :smilie:

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Been riding 13 years, mainly english with a bit of western.. I've considered moving back to Omaha, and going to a community college there and getting my vet tech degree.....

I love this guy, but with him being in the army and then getting out, the distance, and an issue that happened in December it's been hard and he claimed he lost his feelings for me... But me and his family are all hoping he'll change his mind with a bit of distance.... I know I prayed for the first time in a long while.....

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I know how you feel, my bf and I have been together about a year and a half and he's currently deployed til October. It's hard but if the love and will are there, it's amazing what two people can get through. When he gets out next August we'll be moving to Iowa about 45 min from Omaha. I came down here from NY (to Iowa) on a whim one day to come stay with his mom for a month because I needed to get out of NY, so I can def at least partially understand where you're coming from.

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I love this kid but we've been apart and he says he lost his feelings for me... But we're all hoping and praying he changes his mind... I feel kind of like a psycho stalker ex for planning to move up to Omaha where he's living.. But they have a vet tech program and his mom and them is there and rents pretty cheap and it's a big town... But Maybe being close to him we can work things out with time... I dunno

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You may want to wait a few months as the Missouri river is rising like crazy every day. Omaha is going to be flooded. Modale Iowa is going to be non existant. It's going to be bad. Is he in Omaha right now? Try talking to him about it and see what his input is. Unfortunately sometimes once a person has made their mind up, that's it. Feel free to PM me if you wanna talk any further :smileywavey:

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Dont push yourself on him. He's obviously stated how he feels, just because you or his parents want you two together doesnt mean it will happen.

Edited by Wonderish

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He doesn't know i'm even moving up there.. I have no plans on pushing myself on him.. I just love the area honestly.... I still gotta figure loan situation and save up a bit more for an apartment.

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Like I said, by the end of the month, dam near everything along the Missouri river will be flooded, and they are expecting it to be BAD. They've already already shut down I-29 between Loveland and MoValley because of the flooding and it's getting worse everyday. Omaha won't be spared so just be prepared if you're planning on moving out there quick. I would really advise against it sinply for the fact that if he really is over you, and has moved on, you may be better off not being around to see..JMHO

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Oh I know... But I'm planning on getting our of Florida anyways.. I have friends up that way so if I don't see him ever again I really don't care to much *shrugs*

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I feel kind of like a psycho stalker ex for planning to move up to Omaha where he's living.

No matter what your reason for moving might be, this is how it will be percieved by him and everyone around him. I think you will ultimately regret it. Show your strength and move somewhere completely new with a good vet program. Whats that saying, if you love something, let it be free. If it comes back to you, it was always yours. If it doesnt, you never had it to begin with. Do your own thing. Make plans for you. It hurts but you will heal and move on from this fellow.

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No matter what your reason for moving might be, this is how it will be percieved by him and everyone around him. I think you will ultimately regret it. Show your strength and move somewhere completely new with a good vet program. Whats that saying, if you love something, let it be free. If it comes back to you, it was always yours. If it doesnt, you never had it to begin with. Do your own thing. Make plans for you. It hurts but you will heal and move on from this fellow.

Agree. There are a million boys out there!!

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A MILLION boys out there...and a few men. At 19 and with only a year long relationship with him and him being in the military....way too early for a midlife crisis. Find a good vet tech program somewhere else...he's said he's not into you so going where he lives and his family lives DOES look a bit like stalking. Try someplace like Colorado or Texas (CSU and Texas A&M would be good places to look at programs with national reputations for instance)....or California...establish residency there and education costs are minimal...and the education is awesome. Find, get into and finish your education and THEN worry about having a long term relationship....lots of time then and you are independent, educated and don't have to depend on anyone. Much better base from which to work.

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I forget sometimes how young some of you young-uns are....(I mean that sweetly...I have teens). Ya'll remind me that if I can listen to all of you with compassion...I should do likewise for my own.

It is sweet.....live it up while you guys can....40 is closer than you think.

I blinked one day when I was 29 and woke up 40ish.....

I thought I had it all at 19....at least I can say I was so worng (thankfully) about that...

time might be a factor on me now...but a rich life in comparison is definitely this time ....not then.

You will soon be just fine....and laughing at yourself in no time. :smileywavey::huggy:

Edited by teampenninglady123

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Dear X...

Some awfully good advice on this thread. I'll only add a couple of quick comments FWTW:

Relocating can be a very good idea. I did after college, about 1500 miles from home, to where I wanted to work. I loved my family a lot, but it was a very large one with relatives across two counties. It was a very possessive atmosphere and I needed to get away to figure out who I was. Visiting home was always a wonderful experience, but I also like the life I made for myself elsewhere.

Moving can be very scary when you're young. You don't know anyone, and have to start from scratch. That's exhilarating too. Nobody knows you, or what to expect from you, so you won't be prejudged. You can make yourself into what you want to be. The biggest problem is money and a place to stay. In my case, I went to UCLA film school and landed in a dorm. There I made friends and learned to get around L.A. so it worked out pretty well.

OhsoC and others above have given you very straight up advice. I don't know the horse world as they do, but did find another site with horse job listings. Below are some sample positions...there are tons more.

OhsoC -- what do you think of these? I don't have the experience to judge whether they are good jobs or not for her. Please comment on this and don't let me mislead her, okay? I'm trying to help too, but that can be dangerous if you don't know what you're doing -- and frankly, I don't. Thanks!

SAMPLE JOBS ON WHINNY.ORG You can easily find any of these and more at:

http://www.whinny.org/jobs.htm

* * *

Gainesville, VA

BARN WORK IN EXCHANGE FOR CLEAN, NICE 1 BEDROOM APT W/WASHER/DRYER AND ALL UTILITIES INCLUDING CABLE.

We need a barn worker to turn out , muck stall and feed. We also need an instructor so if you are qualified to teach English and Western lessons you will be able to earn income. Non-smoker,no pets and must pass backgroung check. Will consider full care board for right individual.

* * *

Ligonier: Pa

We are looking for a young horse lover to work for room and board and stall for horse...plus we will pay any horse related expenses and activities. Work consists of exercising horses, cleaning tack and may give some lessons for extra money.

Barn manager position may include room and board and stall for horse plus pay or pay only. Salary commensurate with experience. Please call or email if interested.

I have 2 positions that need filled. Our equestrian center has 30 horses and 175 acres.

* * *

Stable hand - Auburn, NY

Wanted: Stable Hand for small hunter/jumper barn. Live in position, can bring own horse, and $100 a week. Duties include stall cleaning, feeding, watering, turn out, and general stable management.

* * *

Farm hand wanted. Glasgow: KY

35ac. Family farm looking for a farm hand to ride green and made horses, fix the occasional fence, etc.

Must be energetic and able to work on his/her own.

Permanent live in position, $200 a week and utilities paid.

* * *

Hughes Quarter Horses

Burleson: TX

Looking for a responsible, competent, and motivated individual to start young horses under saddle.

We are a small operation with a very selective breeding program that is geared toward producing competitive show hunters for both the USEF and AQHA show rings. Our horses are quiet-minded, easy to work with, and very talented. This is an opportunity to greatly increase your knowledge, establish a name for yourself as a trainer, and make contacts in the horse world.

Opportunities to show may be available to the right individual.

This job is quite a bit of hard work in the TX heat. Individuals need not apply if they have a poor work ethic or are looking to make a great deal of $$ this summer. Monetarily, the pay is not spectacular. However, the knowledge you will gain and the opportunities you will be given will make up for the lack of $$$ for someone who is serious about furthering their experience and knowledge as a trainer.

Please e-mail resumes call Morgan Rogers for more information/job requirements.

* * *

Stem: NC

Help needed on large horse farm in NC. 45 mins from Raleigh. Responsibilities include but not limited to: cleaning stalls, feeding, watering, fixing fence, runnning equipment, mowing.

You MUST be responsible, have attention to detail, be self motivating. Knowledge of general horse health and care is helpful/preferred. Housing is provided. Serious inquires please call 717-554-3070 or 919-528-3717

* * *

Saint francis,MN

General care of the facility.

We need a team player to help clean stalls (you will clean about 18 stalls a day, feed & groom.

* *

Lebanon: ME

We have an opening for an apprentice to work with our farm trainer on our breeding/training horse farm.

Learn our proven techinque to training amateur safe show and trail horses that has taken us a life time to perfect. This is a live in position.

* *

Ligonier: Pa

We are looking for a young horse lover to work for room and board and stall for horse...plus we will pay any horse related expenses and activities. Work consists of exercising horses, cleaning tack and may give some lessons for extra money.

Barn manager position may include room and board and stall for horse plus pay or pay only. Salary commensurate with experience. Please call or email if interested.

I have 2 positions that need filled. Our equestrian center has 30 horses and 175 acres.

* *

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All of those sound like wonderful opportunities. Def would have to call of course and make sure that they are paid as well as live in (bills, bills, bills lol). Of course, if she wants to be a vet-tech then my suggestion would be to get accepted to a college with an awesome program (Cornell is very good if you want to head north to NY)

Like I said X, I'm not sure how quickly you want to do this, but I'm advising you..do NOT go to Omaha. This flood is bad and it's barely begun, and it's just going to get worse. That and as others have stated, it sounds as though he's made up his mind. Things will be awkward. Whether you and his folks want you two to get back together isn't going to make a darn bit of difference in what he wants. I know it's not nice to hear, but it is the truth.

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I was just in Omaha yesterday... It won't be for a bit but i've got family there so don't plan on going back like....Tomorrow so I'm not going to... I'm kind of in a whirl-whind and my plans are changing a million times a minute... Guess i'll just see what life brings me.

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Good luck with whatever you decide,i dont think its a mid-life crisis...i think its being young. Im the same way right now. I had plans to move to Casper WY. I had a place to stay,part-time job,accepted into the community college, and place to board my horse. Then life happened and i got pregnant. Now im still planning on going,in a few years. My boyfriend is very supportive and wants to go somewhere new too. Im not sure if it will be WY now,but we are going. I agree,the river is rising and Omaha wont be spared. Come to IL for the U of I vet program. ALOT of hands on experiances.

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